Let there be Love
What it means to forgive, how to handle it to turn things and ourselves better? Don’t you think that it’s of great importance in our lives to understand this every basic thing? Don’t you think it has very great impact on our lives and surroundings too?
Here, I’m just sharing my perception on the subject:
Let’s part it into two categories, that is, Internal and External Forgiveness, and hence, I would say there is an obvious difference between both, internal and external forgiveness. You may forgive a person internally so the pain or the consequences of someone’s wrong doing does not affect you and your energy. However, that does not mean you should necessarily forgive someone externally, it is not mandatory to forgive someone externally. Forgiveness, if that really exists, is for those only who deserve it. So I think there is always need to scrutinize that, are they really worthy of you imparting your forgiveness? Because, chances are if you freely forgive them without any consequence then sometimes it could mean you are only encouraging their actions. Your pain is real, it is not to be messed with, and yes, of course, nobody is perfect but being understanding is what is important at times, and always. Let’s be respectful to each other, decisions are not supposed to be taken in fury of emotions. Nobody feels good when they are stepped on like a doormat, nobody feels good when they are judged by someone who lacks understanding, by someone who is egoistical, narcissist and ignorant. You are a living, breathing and loving creature, that just happens to have a body. If you feel that someone has proved themselves, if they proved themselves worthy of your external forgiveness, well then that’s good, let them into your life. Use your best judgement and be kind, it takes hell lot of investment of time to build up trust and relations, and to knock it down no efforts required.
Love and Peace ~ Vikas Sharma
Expand The Horizon 
Interesting thoughts; but the problem with that is that NONE of us “deserve” forgiveness. True forgiveness is simultaneously internal and external; you might not need to verbalize it, or you might need to – depending on the situation. There is a big difference between forgiveness and being a doormat; between letting someone walk all over you and drawing a line as to what you’ll take from someone, and what you won’t. If they cross that line, respect yourself enough to tell them; if they’re the violent type, then take yourself out of the realm of influence. Unforgiveness, in the end, only damages the unforgiving person….
Again, I would just repeat – forgiveness, if that really exists, is for those only who deserve it. If someone has done something wrong then to be forgiven he has to prove that he really deserve it, else generally people don’t value what they don’t pay for. Yes, there is a difference between forgiveness and being a doormat, and I’m not even comparing it.
Thanks for dropping by and adding your thoughts 🙂
I agree that people need to truly realise the impact of their actions before being externally forgiven but more than often forgiveness is a personal journey and not abt them . It is about dropping the baggage of the rotten potatoes form your back, it is about letting the foul smell of their unacceptable actions go from your mind . Forgiveness is to free yourself from the excess baggage and clear the old stock as the people who did it may or may not be thinking on it but it is playing on our minds constantly and I don’t think that negativity deserves our precious mind space. Let’s focus of love, positivity , peace and harmony.
Yes, it’s more important not to let the consequences of someone’s wrong doing affect our present negatively. Yes, it’s always better and wise to focus on love, positivity, peace and harmony. Actually, I think all the emotions are outcome of love and fear basically.
Well, sadly, it’s real tough, in fact is potentially a challenge to determine who deserves which kinda forgiveness, external or internal. That is what we need to learn for which you used the word ‘scrutinize’ perfectly. 🙂
Yes, you’re right, it’s not that easy, and if this would be so easy then life would be such a cakewalk. Yes, it’s important to scrutinize things appropriately, ’cause assumptions are destructive sometimes.
Thank you 🙂